The CatholiCity Message

Volume VII, Number 1 – January 20, 2003

Dear CatholiCity Citizen,

Welcome to 2003. We've finally thought of a better name than "The Weekly Message" for Whatever This Is You're Writing. They say seven is the perfect number, and so, to begin our seventh year, we shall now refer to this as (drumroll please) The CatholiCity Message. We'll shoot for once or twice a month, as usual. (And we'll miss, as usual.)

1. OH NOTHING
Today we will also break with our tradition of actually writing things for this message by writing about nothing at all this week–just quotes, a prayer and jokes we actually made up ourselves in less than five minutes.

We'll be back soon with a more traditional message wherein we actually write something. Enjoy the quotes, the jokes, and the prayer...

QUOTE OF THE WEEK
"Beware of those who rationalize the legalization of abominations such as abortion or same-sex marriage by appealing to the so-called 'living tradition' of our constitutional law. To declare marriage as anything other than one man to one woman is to kill the reality of marriage itself. The only way to keep tradition alive is to adhere to it."
G.K. MacBrien

"May the peace of Christ disturb you."
Anonymous

2. PLEASE JOIN...
...the tens of thousands of CatholiCity Citizens in the prayer that we wrote to kick off 2001, which apparently had a big impact on our readers. Take a moment to gather yourself and truly address your heart and mind to Our Lord in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit...

"Dear Jesus, we see you in our mind's eye, walking toward us, dressed in your seamless white garment, your arms open, a peaceful calm in your brown eyes. We see the open wounds in your hands. We reach with our right hand and touch the wounds, then fall to our knees. You are our Lord and our God! We feel the warmth as you place your hands upon our heads; you listen in silence as we relay to you, in our hearts, the needs of our souls, our sorrow for our sins, the needs of our wives, husbands, our children, our parents, our neighbors, and our friends. Grant all these intentions! Give us the grace to be saints this year, Jesus. Give us the grace to not allow our fear of humiliation stop us from showing and telling people about you, your mother, your Church, your pope, your truth, and your sacraments. And please, introduce us to Saint Joseph this year. Amen."

LAME JOKES

If a neurotic woman married a psychiatrist would he have enough patience?

If a seamstress married an anarchist would they sew confusion?

If a man married a woman from the west would he be disoriented?

If a city lady married a farmer would he be a tractor to her?

Can a butcher leave his parents and cleave unto a vegetarian?

With Christ,

Your Friends at CatholiCity