The CatholiCity Message

Volume II, Number 30 – August 12, 1998

Dear CatholiCity Citizen,

A few important items this week.

1. THE SOUL OF THOMAS MERIMEE
Thomas Merimee, the father of our operations manager at the Mary Foundation, passed away last week. At our request, many of you prayed for him during his last days on earth. Mr. Merimee, a research scientist, received Last Rites within minutes of his death, and recently told his family that he wanted to be known as a man who died as a good, faithful, practicing Roman Catholic. Throughout his adult life, he received Communion daily. He is survived by his wife, Martha, and three sons. Please say a prayer for his soul.

2. ONCE, TWICE, THREE TIMES A LADY
Many CatholiCity Webcam junkies have enjoyed the refreshing, wholesome beauty of our female summer intern. This Window of Beauty ends, sadly, when she leaves for grad studies at Franciscan University of Steubenville on August 21st. But wait! Who is that lovely brunette sitting next to her? It's the stunning wife of another worker, who will be helping fill the Intern-Gap part-time, usually on Tuesday and Wednesday mornings. If you are reading this CatholiCity Message on Wednesday before 5:30 PM Eastern Time, you can enjoy the "view" right now. The third beauty, on the bottom left of your screen, is a genuine Carmelite nun doll, a recent gift from the Blessings Doll Company.

(WEBCAM DISABLED TO PROTECT WORKER PRIVACY)

QUOTE OF THE WEEK
"At least we'll beat the noontime rush."
The grandfather of one of our workers, deceased, on the advantages of buying ice-cream cones at 9:00 AM. Some of you might remember this immortal line, word-for-word, when it was used in the famous and hilarious Wendy's Hamburger commercials of the 1980s. It was used in the commercial about getting the "Nine O'Clock burgers at Ten O'Clock." This grandfather's son grew up to be the head of the advertising agency that produced those commercials (including the legendary "Where's the Beef?" classics.)

REALLY BAD PUN-JOKES OF THE WEEK
Our thanks to John D. for passing along most of these awful jokes. He was one of our worker's Parish Youth Minister whom our worker tortured mercilessly in high school. Now a dad with children of his own, the Youth Minister "found" our worker through CatholiCity last year. Our worker apologized for all the terrible things he did to him, and, to his car. All is forgiven.

"Did you hear about the tap dancer who broke his ankle in the sink?"

"Did you hear about the dyslexic satanist who sold his soul to Santa?"

"Did you hear about the Eskimo who sat on the ice too long and got polaroids?"

"What has four legs, is big green and fuzzy, and if it fell out of a tree would kill you?" "A pool table."

"Why did the monkey fall out of the tree?" "Because it was dead."

"Why are there so many Smiths in the phone book?" "They all have phones." Enough? Okay, one more.

"What do you get when you cross a highway with a piano?" "Run over and killed."

See you next week, when you recover.

We remain yours with Immaculate Mary,

Your Friends at CatholiCity